[mp3 Drive Thru - N.E.R.D. feat. Santigold & Julian of The Strokes]
[mp3 Between the Bars - Madeleine Peyroux (Elliott Smith Cover)]
[mp3 Walkabout - Atlas Sound feat Panda Bear]
[mp3 Dying is Fine - Ra Ra Riot]

Between the click of the Light, and the Start of the Dream

An earlier update than most. I am finished my work very early today, and I am also rather sleepy. It looks to rain. I can’t wait to pass out for a bit after work. I can spare around 2 hours. I wonder if Anne and I will end up going to Cage tonight. I want to. So does she. But we both have been pretty inactive this week, which has actually been pretty nice. I’d like to get 8 hours sleep for once, pretty soon.
Chris Cosgrove is djing tomorrow at Tsunami. I don’t know if this means I will go out or not. Likely not.
I wonder if I will more consistently help Anne now that I have an ipod again. I need to download some stuff.

[mp3 No Cars Go - Arcade Fire]

A Normal Non-Cryptic/Emotional Update

No complaints I suppose. Still having a hard time getting into my normal routine. I haven’t grocery shopped. I’m showering infrequently, and haven’t kept my apartment clean. I’m trying to sort that out this week however.

I’m getting a couch as soon as Will, the Seller and I sort out a good day to go pick it up. That will really motivate me to get my apartment together. As for today Christine, my step mother, and my dad need some hang out time. Apparently they’ve been pretty stressed and would like to hang out and take it easy together. Anne and I took a pact not to drink for a week. I hadn’t been getting majorly trashed or anything but I had been drinking on a frequent basis. A couple beers at least every other day up to a bottle of wine (Friday only). However, I have a good mind to suspect that Christine will want me to drink with her. I suppose I could have one cocktail. Following this I will head to my mom’s to get some laundry done as well as download some songs. I should be to bed at a reasonable time.

Tomorrow Cage is playing in DC. Anne and I are to go. Crap! We need to get tickets.
Thursday is another taking it easy day. Anne doesn’t dj which means I don’t go to Tsunami! Friday I think Jason and I are seeing Funny People which actually looks pretty good, at first I thought it looked pretty bad. I may or may not go out dancing with some friends to Dan Deacon…like I said I plan to take it easy this weekend.

[mp3 Never Knew You - Cage]

Next weekend however! Elisha, Rachel and Megan are coming to visit! I’m stoked on that! Beach House is playing Friday in Baltimore, I hope they want to go. Who knows what else the weekend holds. The following weekend is Animal Collective in NYC!!!!!
Thank you,

Day and Night

And while chances are good we'll never leave this limbo, I can't seem to shake you no matter what the circumstances. It's a lot of pushing and pulling and we take turns in positions. We take our time in remission. There's something here you can't deny as well as me. And through our criptic language it shows. If its not the words, it's the tone. If its not the tone, its the words. Or contradictory following statements. You've made mistakes and now I can say that I have, assuming we ever reach a destination where we'd look back. But where I stand today the future holds your name, and for you it holds mine. We inch there. I may be more certain than you, but we both share our fear, that's for sure, as well as our excitement in the opportunity we hold. You're wiser in ways; to keep so firmly on the ground, but I'm more alive with my head in the clouds. You and I collide at the horizon, there's a balance in our opposition. You know this.

I am Tired. I am True of Heart.

I felt myself getting right back into the swing of things. It was just as it was which also means inadvertently leading to disappointment that has already come and gone (and comes and goes and comes and goes) And when a smile crept upon my face sprouting from your pecular charms, i suddenly reminded myself of the past week, and other occasions prior and with the closing of my eyes it washed from my face and a sinking feeling in my stomach dropped with the same gravity of my eye lids.
Our talking didn't stop there, continued on as it would. Oh, the constant biting of my tongue. Backtracking to say something trivial and polite in response to your sweet self deprivating humor as opposed to my adoration of the terrible little things that make you, you.Learning to approach with a new discorse one of friendship without that winsome affectionate overtone we're both so fond of.
I've just grown tired of attempting to help others grow and losing myself for even good people like you find a way to be destructive to keep their comfortable misery.

If I didn't feel so down it would be suffice to say that I didn't mean any of it.
I'm proud to feel sad, as it shows I'm alive.

I've Grown Tired of Holding This Pose

Today at work is better than the rest on one hand; because I was out Friday there is plenty of work to be done! I’m coming to a close with less than two hours to spare today. I guess it would be a little better if for some unexplainable reason I didn’t feel mildly under the weather. I had a splendid relaxing weekend. I was in bed at a good hour with the exception of Dylan bugging me to wake up. But I feel a little queasy, and fairly tense. The evening will likely be spent doing little. I think I’ll take a nap, go to the gym for a bit and do a little bit of cleaning and organizing. The day to pull myself together is at hand, but I don’t think it’s today. Too tired.

My father adorably called me at work today, concerned about my well being due to my facebook status, something I now know he keeps a sharp eye on. This doesn’t make me uncomfortable, I don’t really hide anything from my parents. They usually know my every move. It in fact makes me feel loved and watched after on a small scale.

I have to take measurements for my possible new couch! Gee I hope it fits, and then make arrangements for Will and I to drive out and get it! He’s so endlessly dependable. I have to do something to repay him. I have offered to help clean and organize his house as well as decorating and painting it there after. I hope this is sufficient. When it comes to good people like him, and like Anne. I don’t feel like I give back enough.

I’m also registering for class this week. Once that begins I doubt I’ll have time for anyone to waste anymore.


So I’ll be taking it pretty easy. Maybe the gym here and there, maybe doing nothing with a select few. But mostly it will be spent reading and napping I think. Anne and I are going to see Cage next week and Elisha visits that weekend. I have to be pretty careful with my money anyway.

Broccoli

Ow I want my teeth back. I can feel this in every single one of my teeth. I have worsened things for myself. The money I lack this week is the source of so many problems. Can’t replace my cell phone. Can’t buy groceries. And I’m starving seeing how I can’t eat anything substancial. In desperation at my parents I ate the left over (delicious) grilled veggies from their dinner. And that broccoli ruined my life. I chewed, a mistake, and part of it got lodged in one of my gaping holes and hurt quite badly when it came out. I slept on a pillow of frozen peas. I have brought those peas to work with me today. I am starving again. This is such misery.

Hurts Me, Darling, Hurts Me

I am exhausted and it serves me right. How are you going to get surgery on your feet, and then a week later get your wisdom teeth removed, as a result of which be on a liquid only diet which as you can assume doesn’t lead to much of a calorie intake. I cleaned my apartment like a crazy person and then had the genius idea to drink. Oh the misery.

I’m attempting a chipotle burrito bol today. I actually want to feel like I’ve eaten something!! Today I’m going to take some measurements in my apartment to make sure I can get this couch in, and that it’ll fit nicely. I’m rather excited about it. And Will has access to a pick up truck and will help me transport it! Is there any other news to speak of? I don’t think so. I’m torn in my love affairs. I lost my cell phone (CANNOT FIND IT!), I’m getting internet and cable next month as well as starting school. I’m certainly moving toward the future. Its so close.

I can feel the weight redistributing across my teeth. I don’t like it one bit.

[mp3] White Rabbit - Jefferson Airplane

Please, again, try to say Megan Fox hasn't had surgery

Frankly I think she was prettier before..like below

"I count him braver who overcomes his own desire than who conquers his enemies, for the hardest victory is overself"

Don't Mistake Me

Things are UP!

I get my stitches out today, this fills me with delight. I'm going to go to a spin class straight after! Bad idea you say? WRONG! I need to keep blood flowing through my feet and legs, they like how active I've become! Gosh I've missed working out.
Following that I'm hitting the town with Anne, Will and John! It's Kevin's art show (I may even buy something!) Its going to be quite the night! Matt is to join at some point as well. I'm happy our friendship has gotten where it is. Tonight will shine :)

And I'm off work tomorrow, what a relief! how exciting! Jess is having a party I'm going to attend, I haven't seen her in quite sometime. A Pool Party!
I may or may not hop to another party with Jenn in the evening. And I'm not sure if Guy gets home tonight or tomorrow, but hes elegedly having a party, I hope its tomorrow not Saturday. I gave my word to Rachel, Scott and Elisha that I'd go to Pa. Guy and I have a score to settle. It'll be fun dreadful to see him.

Oh summer, I'm excited to see you after all. Despite a lot of downers, I have a lot of friends who love me and good time ahead.